“For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.
Neither was the man created for the woman;
but the woman for the man.”
I Corinthians 11:8-9
Several months ago I began reading through the book Created to be his Help Meet with about 33+ other women (communicating via email). Basically it was a bunch of us who knew each other through church or other places who had an interest in working through this book.
I want to share a review of the book because some of you have shown an interest and I believe there is a lot of biblical wisdom shared in the book along with practical advice on how to apply it to marriage. The book also includes help on some incredibly difficult issues many wives, couples, and families are facing today.
Created to be His Help Meet is written by Debi Pearl with some help by her husband Michael who shares advice for some legal/criminal issues of abuse some wives are facing. The Pearls are very adamant about including the authorities in situations of abuse. Some of the issues they confront in this book have to do with child sexual abuse, husbands who cross-dress, husbands who ask their wives to break the law and more.<——-But that is only part of the book!!
The heart of the book is about helping wives understand their biblical, scriptural role in being created by God to be their husband’s help meet. The Pearl’s do give advice on how to practically carry out God’s commands to wives.
Now, let me say. I am a bible believer, first and foremost. The way we apply scripture in our lives practically-speaking may look different from one wife to another.
That being said, I’m not endorsing all of the Pearl’s advice as if it were from God, Himself. If it isn’t plainly written in scripture than it may just be advice on how to practically apply the scriptures in a given situation. That doesn’t mean they are wrong in their counsel but keep in mind, we are all sinners saved by grace (that is, those who have accepted Christ’s payment for their sins) so none of us is perfect and the Pearl’s would be the first to admit that applies to them too.
There are 24 chapters in the book and at the beginning Debi asks you to make a list of ten things you’d like to see changed in your marriage. Save that list!
Each chapter ends with something to reflect on or to consider. She suggest word bible studies. You can use a concordance to easily find all the verses in the bible that contain specific words. Some of the words Debi suggests you study are graciousness and wisdom to name a couple. I suggest using a Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance. If I want all verses in the bible that contain a specific word I want to study I need that concordance. However, some bibles have a small concordance in the back of them that offers several verses- just not all of them.
Candace Cameron Burr (former child tv-actress DJ from A Full House & Kirk Cameron’s sister) is quoted in this article as crediting Created to be His Help Meet for showing her what changes she needed to make in her life that she says eventually led her husband to Christ.
In the book Debi also shares letters from some who have sought her and Michael’s counsel as well as her responses to those letters. The Pearl’s have the non-profit ministry No Greater Joy helping families with child-training, marriage counseling, creating resources that take the gospel into foreign lands and more.
I do recommend Debi’s “help meet” book but its not for the faint of heart and if you’re easily offended, well, you’ll probably be offended. She says some hard things but many of us need to hear hard things when its about truth. Ever since the first woman was created (and by Adam’s rib no less!) and living in the Garden of Eden (Eve!) women have been known to be easily deceived and we are very capable of not only falling for Satan’s lies but also of deceiving our own selves.
*I’ve also read To Train Up a Child and may do a review on it as well in the future. Regardless of what some think, this is a very good book about biblical child-training! (Thought I’d give a heads up about that.)
- You can also follow the Pearl’s ministry on Facebook and watch their Question & Answer and other videos on their NGJ Ministries Channel on YouTube.
Its very obvious that the Pearl’s are much loved and appreciated by those who have benefited from their counsel.
- You can visit the store at No Greater Joy for more info on all their books, dvds, cds and their FREE newsletter/magazine (I subscribe to this and enjoy reading it).
In addition to Created to be His Help Meet they also have a book for girls desiring marriage someday in the future called Preparing to be His Help Meet and Michael is just coming out with a book for men titled Created to NEED a Help Meet. Boy, would I’d love to read that one 😉